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Free puns sayings, quotes and quotations


  A man who could make so vile a pun would not scruple to pick a pocket.
 ~sayings puns quotes by John Dennis, 1781

  People who make puns are like wanton boys that put coppers on the railroad tracks. They amuse themselves and other children, but their little trick may upset a freight train of conversation for the sake of a battered witticism.
 ~inspirational sayings about Puns quotes by Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr., The Autocrat of the Breakfast-Table, 1858

  The goodness of the true pun is in the direct ratio of its intolerability.
 ~puns quotes by Edgar Allan Poe, Marginalia, 1849

  A pun is the lowest form of humor, unless you thought of it yourself.
 ~famous quotes about Puns by Doug Larson

  A pun does not commonly justify a blow in return. But if a blow were given for such cause, and death ensued, the jury would be judges both of the facts and of the pun, and might, if the latter were of an aggravated character, return a verdict of justifiable homicide.
 ~puns sayings by Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr., The Autocrat of the Breakfast-Table, 1858

  A pun is not bound by the laws which limit nicer wit. It is a pistol let off at the ear; not a feather to tickle the intellect.
 ~sayings puns quotes by Charles Lamb, Popular Fallacies: That the Worst Puns are the Best, Last Essays of Elia, 1833

  Puns are little plays on words that a certain breed of person loves to spring on you and then look at you in a certain self-satisfied way to indicate that he thinks that you must think that he is by far the cleverest person on Earth now that Benjamin Franklin is dead, when in fact what you are thinking is that if this person ever ends up in a lifeboat, the other passengers will hurl him overboard by the end of the first day even if they have plenty of food and water.
 ~inspirational sayings about Puns quotes by Dave Barry, Why Humor Is Funny

  A pun is a short quip followed by a long groan.
 ~puns quotes by Author Unknown

  Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted.
 ~famous quotes about Puns by Fred Allen

  A good pun is its own reword.
 ~puns sayings by Author Unknown

  In the pun, two strings of thought are tangled into one acoustic knot.
 ~sayings puns quotes by Arthur Koestler

   A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes.
 ~sayings puns quotes by Hugh Downs

   Don't worry about avoiding temptation - as you grow older, it starts avoiding you.
 ~good sayings about Age by Author Unknown

   How many cares one loses when one decides not to be something but to be someone.
 ~puns quotes by Gabrielle Coco Chanel

   Every two years the American politics industry fills the airwaves with the most virulent, scurrilous, wall-to-wall character assassination of nearly every political practitioner in the country - and then declares itself puzzled that America has lost trust in its politicians.
 ~motivational quotes about Trust sayings by Charles Krauthammer

   Firelight will not let you read fine stories but it's warm and you won't see the dust on the floor.
 ~puns sayings by Irish Proverb

   When suffering comes, we yearn for some sign from God, forgetting we have just had one.
 ~sayings puns quotes by Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

   Corpse pose restores life. Dead parts of your being fall away, the ghosts are released.
 ~good sayings about Yoga by Terri Guillemets

   I think it pisses God off if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don't notice it.... People think pleasing God is all God care about. But any fool living in the world can see it always trying to please us back.
 ~puns quotes by Alice Walker, The Color Purple, 1982

   DoN't FiNd FaULt,FiNd ThE rEmEdY
 ~motivational quotes about Attitude sayings by Korn

   Once you choose hope, anything's possible.
 ~puns sayings by Christopher Reeve

   If it be a sin to covet honor, I am the most offending soul.
 ~sayings puns quotes by William Shakespeare

   Friends can be said to fall in like with as profound a thud as romantic partners fall in love.
 ~good sayings about Friendship by Letty Cottin Pogrebin

   A King, realizing his incompetence, can either delegate or abdicate his duties. A Father can do neither
 ~puns quotes by Marlene Dietrich

   The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we quit it with regret; we make up our minds every night to leave it early, but we make up our bodies every morning to keep it late.
 ~motivational quotes about Sleep sayings by Charles Caleb Colton

   I love the place; the magnificent books; I require books as I require air.
 ~puns sayings by Sholem Asch

   The family - that dear octopus from whose tentacles we never quite escape, nor, in our inmost hearts, ever quite wish to.
 ~sayings puns quotes by Dodie Smith

   How glorious a greeting the sun gives the mountains!
 ~good sayings about Nature by John Muir

   If you cut a thing up, of course it will smell. Hence, nothing raises such an infernal stink at last, as human psychology.
 ~puns quotes by D.H. Lawrence

   Many things grow in the garden that were never sown there.
 ~motivational quotes about Gardens sayings by Thomas Fuller, Gnomologia, 1732

   Feminism directly confronts the idea that one person or set of people [has] the right to impose definitions of reality on others.
 ~puns sayings by Liz Stanley and Sue Wise

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