Free puns sayings, quotes and quotations
Puns are little plays on words that a certain breed of person loves to spring on you and then look at you in a certain self-satisfied way to indicate that he thinks that you must think that he is by far the cleverest person on Earth now that Benjamin Franklin is dead, when in fact what you are thinking is that if this person ever ends up in a lifeboat, the other passengers will hurl him overboard by the end of the first day even if they have plenty of food and water.
~famous puns by Dave Barry, Why Humor Is Funny
Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted.
~inspirational sayings about Puns quotes by Fred Allen
People who make puns are like wanton boys that put coppers on the railroad tracks. They amuse themselves and other children, but their little trick may upset a freight train of conversation for the sake of a battered witticism.
~puns quotes by Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr., The Autocrat of the Breakfast-Table, 1858
A pun does not commonly justify a blow in return. But if a blow were given for such cause, and death ensued, the jury would be judges both of the facts and of the pun, and might, if the latter were of an aggravated character, return a verdict of justifiable homicide.
~famous quotes about Puns by Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr., The Autocrat of the Breakfast-Table, 1858
A good pun is its own reword.
~puns sayings by Author Unknown
A pun is the lowest form of humor, unless you thought of it yourself.
~famous puns by Doug Larson
A man who could make so vile a pun would not scruple to pick a pocket.
~inspirational sayings about Puns quotes by John Dennis, 1781
In the pun, two strings of thought are tangled into one acoustic knot.
~puns quotes by Arthur Koestler
The goodness of the true pun is in the direct ratio of its intolerability.
~famous quotes about Puns by Edgar Allan Poe, Marginalia, 1849
A pun is not bound by the laws which limit nicer wit. It is a pistol let off at the ear; not a feather to tickle the intellect.
~puns sayings by Charles Lamb, Popular Fallacies: That the Worst Puns are the Best, Last Essays of Elia, 1833
A pun is a short quip followed by a long groan.
~famous puns by Author Unknown
It is easier to fight for one's principles than to live up to them.
~famous puns by Alfred Adler
In June as many as a dozen species may burst their buds on a single day. No man can heed all of these anniversaries; no man can ignore all of them.
~good sayings about Nature by Aldo Leopold
Once you choose hope, anything's possible.
~puns quotes by Christopher Reeve
Hem your blessings with thankfulness so they don't unravel
~motivational quotes about Thank You. sayings by Author Unknown
Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
~puns sayings by Chinese Proverb
A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours.
~famous puns by Milton Berle
For one human being to love another that is perhaps the most difficult of our tasks; the ultimate, the last test and proof; the work for which all other work is but preparation.
~good sayings about Love by Rainer Maria Rilke
We don't need to increase our goods nearly as much as we need to scale down our wants. Not wanting something is as good as possessing it.
~puns quotes by Donald Horban
A bank book makes good reading - better than some novels.
~motivational quotes about Money sayings by Harry Lauder
If we desire respect for the law, we must first make the law respectable.
~puns sayings by Louis D. Brandeis
After all, I don't see why I am always asking for private, individual, selfish miracles when every year there are miracles like white dogwood.
~famous puns by Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Grandmothers are just antique little girls.
~good sayings about Grandparents by Author Unknown
There isn't any formula or method. You learn to love by loving -- by paying attention and doing what one thereby discovers has to be don
~puns quotes by Helen Hayes
Most anthologists of quotations are like those who eat cherries or oysters: first picking the best ones and winding up by eating everything.
~motivational quotes about Quotations sayings by Sebastien Roch Nicolas Chamfort, Maxims, 1825
One only needs two tools in life: WD-40 to make things go, and duck tape to make them stop
~puns sayings by G.M. Weilacher
Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save
~famous puns by Will Rogers, Autobiography, 1949
The human understanding is like a false mirror, which, receiving rays irregularly, distorts and discolors the nature of things by mingling its own nature with it.
~good sayings about Reality by Francis Bacon
It is now quite lawful for a Catholic woman to avoid pregnancy by a resort to mathematics, though she is still forbidden to resort to physics or chemistry.
~puns quotes by H.L. Mencken, Notebooks, 1956
If civilization has risen from the Stone Age, it can rise again from the Wastepaper Age.
~motivational quotes about Environment sayings by Jacques Barzun, The House of Intellect, 1959
Children have never been good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.
~puns sayings by James Baldwin
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